What started out as a seemingly simple trip to the doctor to find out why my neck was feeling so constricted lately quickly escalated into an 8-night stay at the hospital full of scans, biopsies, and blood-work which ultimately concluded that I have Stage II Hodgkin’s Lymphoma.
Believe me – to say this has been quite a shock is to say the least. I’ll be turning 35 years old next month and this is something I would have never guessed I’d be dealing with at this stage of my life. I’ve always worked very, very hard to stay in stay in good shape, eat healthy, and keep things positive. However as I’m slowly understanding, sometimes life has its own unique set of challenges in mind for you no matter what kind of life you lead.
Why Am I Sharing With You That I Have Cancer?
I know it’s not very often that I share a lot of deeply personal things with you, my readers. Please do know that my intention here isn’t to get any special sympathy or make you think differently of me.
The reason I wanted to share this news with you is because you’re a part of this blog. And as you can probably guess, this news is going to have a big impact on me, my thinking, and the things I will likely write about going forward.
For as long as I’ve been writing My Money Design I have always maintained that it is bigger than just being a website about money. It’s about life and figuring out a way to make it the way YOU want it so that you can live it to the fullest.
Whether the topics I’d write about were about money, blogging, or even philosophy, they were always nothing more than just a reflection of what’s going on in my own life and the thoughts I’d like to work through.
Plus quite honestly accepting the fact that I have cancer and where it’s going to go from here has been just about the only thing I can think about.
Now What Does This Mean for the Future?
As cliché as this may sound, I’m going to come right out and tell you that this situation definitely puts a different perspective on many different things in my life.
All of the sudden simple things like snuggling up with my wife, listening to the stories my kids want to tell me about their day, and talking to my parents more often on the phone carry a much different weight than they did just a few weeks ago.
Thankfully my wife and I have received a generous amount of support from family, friends, and both of our employers. And for that we are grateful.
Does This Change Our Financial Plans?
I’m sure some people might wonder how this news might affect my thoughts on long-term financial planning and money in general. Am I going to start living life in the now and completely throw all our savings efforts to the winds?
I can tell you with a great deal of certainty that I don’t believe so.
Although my priorities may change going forward, one thing I’m finding a lot of comfort in is to still believe that all the goals and dreams I’ve set out to achieve are still going to be reality. The vision of my wife and family reaching a place of financial freedom is something that is absolutely precious to me, and cancer is not going to stand in the way of that.
I think a large part of attitude towards this is that I understand that money is a tool, not the prize. For me, time has always been the ultimate prize. And I’m not about to take my eyes off that prize or do anything to compromise getting there. I’m playing for keeps.
This is just yet going to be another one of those major curves in life that will challenge who you are and who you become. If there’s one thing I’m learning about making plans it’s that plans ever rarely work out the way you think they are going to. But that DOESN’T mean you give up on your goals or quit because you’ve hit a bump in the road. It just means you re-evaluate your plans and make changes where you have to.
Dealing with cancer will certainly qualify as a pretty big bump in the road. But I’m optimistic and not about to let it stop me from going where I want to be.
Please Go to the Doctor:
If there’s anything I can encourage you to do after reading this post, it’s please go to the doctor.
Have you had a physical lately? Do you have some health problem that has been bothering you?
I can tell you the day I went to get my neck checked out I felt so silly and like a total hypochondriac. “It’s probably just strained from working out or stress” I thought. But as I quickly found out, the case was entirely different. And who knew that one little small thing like that would quickly reveal a much larger and bigger problem than I could have ever realized.
If not for yourself, do it for your family. Please give your health the love and attention it deserves.
Image courtesy of Pinterest
I’m at a loss for words.. I’m really sorry ’bout your condition 🙁
No worries. I’m just going to accept what’s in front of me and move forward.
Great to hear your positivity! Good luck on your new journey!
MMD,
Sorry to hear about you diagnosis. Your call to see a doctor resonates with me as I’m overdue and a family member of mine is in the hospital. I’m calling today. Best wishes in this next chapter for you.
My neighbor had Hodgkin’s when his kids were very young. He’s near 70 now and as crazy as ever (not due to the illness!).
-RBD
Thanks RBD! That’s encouraging to hear; I’ve got no plans to shut down before I’m 70!
Wow. Sorry to hear this and wish you the very best. Reading this post sounds like you approaching this with a great attitude, and that. is sometimes half the battle.
I completely agree! I think not hiding from the situation and getting right out in front of it is about the best way I can come out on top.
Wow. I am so surprised and sorry to hear about this! I also know this post had to be hard to write. I wish you well, my friend. We will all be pulling for you.
Thanks SB. Yes, this wasn’t the easiest post to write. But I’m finding that just being honest with the situation and verbalizing it is helping me to want to overcome it.
MMD,
I wish you the best of luck in your battle and I pray for a recovery.
Sincerely,
Deets
Thanks Deets!
We’re pulling for you, MMD.
I appreciate the support RRQ.
I’m so sorry to hear this, and thank you for sharing so honestly with your readers! I’m keeping you and your family in my thoughts.
Thanks Emma.
I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this. I’m sending over lots of love from this little piece of the internet.
I’ll take it! Thanks!
I am so sorry to hear this news. It makes you wonder if eating right and working out does help at all. I’ll be thinking about you and your family.
Thanks Kim. I’m sure this is just one of those things that chalks up to no matter how you treat your body things are just going to happen and grow inside that you can’t control or prevent.
Holy smokes MMD…I was hoping your post title was a ruse. Your attitude in such a difficult circumstance is encouraging and inspiring. I’ll be praying for you and family.
Thanks for the prayers Brian.
MMD,
I’m shocked at the news you have shared and I wish you the best of luck to battle the cancer. I agree with the other commenter, that said you seem to have a good attitude about it. Staying positive is great for the mind. I will say to ease up a bit and save less, but enjoy more experiences because with cancer time is of the essence until you are in the clear. Good Luck .
Thanks EL. I’m sure there will be a lot more spontaneous purchases and experiences coming up here in the next few months as I find myself with more and more time to re-evaluate my priorities even further.
Many thoughts and prayers your way MMD… this is news nobody should have to hear, especially at 35, but sounds like you have a great support system around you! Let us know if there is anything us blog readers can do…
Thanks JR.
Here’s to a speedy recovery! My father was diagnosed with cancer last year during a routine check up that my mom had to cancel, so my dad went instead. They “stumbled upon” the cancer while testing something else and because they were able to catch it while it was still contained, it was operated on and gone within a few months. Talk about the importance of going to the doctor! Wishing you much goodness!
Wow, what luck they were able to catch it and get rid of it so quickly. I’m really hoping my luck turns out to be just as positive. Thanks Stefanie.
Wow. I don’t even know what to say. I am so sorry. Stay positive and keep your head up!
I definitely will Michelle. Thanks.
I wish you the best MMD! I’m certainly at a loss for words, but will be sending you encouragement through this battle.
I’ll take all the support I can Grayson. Thanks!
A friend of mine with cancer said he hated when people said “I’m sorry.” I don’t know if that’s the case for everyone, but I’m just going to say I’m sending every good thought I have to you and your family. Please keep us posted on your journey, and thank you for your selfless message of encouraging others to see someone if they think something is bothering them. Who cares if anyone else things they are just being overly paranoid! I wish you nothing but the best my friend!
Thanks Tonya!
Sending positive vibes your way…wishing you the best!
I appreciate it Kristin. Thank you for the warm wishes.
Wow MMD. Like others have said, you seem to have a good attitude about it which is vitally important. Please know you’ll be in our thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery. That said, I could not agree more that time is the ultimate prize, far too few realize that.
Thanks John.
So glad you caught it! Now you can treat it swiftly and mercilessly until it is gone. Completely gone.
Wishing you the best!
Thanks Holly!
Holy crap MMD! As you know, I know far too well what it’s like to deal with this cancer beast from watching my father-in-law fight it for most of the past year. And it didn’t exactly end for our family the way that we had hoped.
Keeping you and your family in my prayers. Thanks for sharing this very personal detail in your life. My best piece of advice – never lose hope. No matter what! Stay positive and always believe wholeheartedly that you are going to beat this thing.
Thanks for the encouragement Matt. Again I’m really sorry to hear you already had to deal with something like this in your own life with the FIL. I’ll definitely think of your advice and keep the hopes high!
Wow, I have no words. I admire your strength and wisdom during this difficult time. My thoughts are with you and your family. Keep us updated!
Thanks Melanie. I appreciate it.
This must have been a hard post to write…and my heart bleeds for you and your family. I clicked through the link to read about Hodgkin’s Lymphoma and was glad to see that it is treatable.
I’ve been my mother’s caretaker for the last year; she has stage 4 lung cancer. It’s a recurrence for her. And while my mother’s path is much different from yours, I have an understanding when you speak of the shift in priorities when faced with this type of news.
Relationships deepen, hurts can heal, things can become more beautiful.
It’s terrible that a cancer diagnosis (or other serious disease) is what it takes to gain clarity, but if that’s the gift, I’ll take it.
I’ll hold you and your family in my heart and I’m sending warm and healing thoughts your way.
To life ~
Ree
Thank you very much for sharing Ree. During one of my first scans I sat with a woman in the waiting room who was having a re-occurrence of lung cancer. It was really hard to listen to her story and difficult to know how to give her any comfort, so I can’t imagine what that must be like for you. I guess if there is anything to be taken from this experience its as you said – gaining clarity about what is truly important. Well said.
Oh my gosh man, my guess was way off in our emails! I’m so sorry. Way to put it all out here though and share your experience!! Will keep you and your beautiful wife and kids in our prayers, we’re all rooting for you!!
No worries J. At the time we were still waiting to hear what the actual diagnosis was. I really appreciate the positive support.
Sending good vibes your way MMD. Thanks for sharing and for the valuable reminder. Like Ree I’m glad to hear it’s treatable.
Thanks FF. I’m very glad as well to see everything I’m reading saying that the prognosis is good.
Thank you for this post, for your optimism, and for the great reminder to stay up to date on my checkups.
You are in my thoughts.
Thanks Mario. Definitely do go get looked at if its been a while.
I’m sorry to hear this. But also glad you went to the doctor and are receiving the support you need.
Thanks Jackie.
I’m so sorry to hear about what you’re going through.
Keep your chin up though, a good friend of mine had lymphoma and managed to go for 2 years without treatment, just by leading a healthier lifestyle. Eventually he did go for treatment and he’s been in remission now for a little over 2 years.
Ironically, he said it was the best thing that could have happened to him. He took time off work, spent time with his young family and got to doing those things that you’ve always wanted to do, but always put it off.
Don’t put off your long term financial goals, you’ll be here a long while yet!
Thanks Mr Ikonz. I’m finding stories of encouragement like this to be really helpful. I really can’t wait to say I’ve got this behind me, and I will certainly be using any time off or opportunities I have to just appreciate all that I have.
Hopefully you’ll look back on it an think what a wonderful “wake up call” moment it was in life!
Wow! I am 36 years old, and I can imagine what this news felt like to you. I have no answers for you, but please know that I am sending positive thoughts your way. Please keep us posted on your journey and we will keep you in our prayers.
I appreciate it Shannon. Thanks.
MMD,
I don’t even know what to say. You and your family will definitely be in my thoughts. If I can help in any way, let me know. I’m glad you have a positive attitude because I fully believe that you can beat this disease.
I hope you have a quick recovery and are back to your healthy self soon.
Lance
Looking forward to nothing but beating this! Thanks Lance.
Praying for you and your family. Thank you for sharing your journey with us readers – Wishing you nothing but the best 🙂
Thanks Sarah.
Keep up the positive attitude, MMD. This community will be praying for you and sending good vibes your way.
I will do Ben. It does feel as though this is going to be one of those things were ultimately your attitude is all you will have to stand on. So I must choose well!
Sorry to hear about your situation MMD. Our family will definitely keep you in our prayers.
Thanks Chris.
You and your family will be in our thoughts, MMD.
I appreciate it Mrs PoP.
MMD. I had Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma at 19. I’m now 37 with a child. You can beat this.
For me, the journey (e.g., chemo, radiation, etc.) sucked at first but got better as I learned my own body and how to deal with the different challenges. As others have said, it was probably the best thing that happened to me.
Wish you the best. Feel free to reach out if you want to chat…..
Alok
Holy cow, 19?? That must have been a huge shocker. I’m glad to hear you are almost 20 years over this now – that’s really encouraging to know. Hopefully I can find the same sort of strengths you found within this experience. Thanks for reaching out.
I admire the strength and attitude you have, and thank you for sharing this piece of your journey with us. I’m sure a lot of us put off going to the doctor when we have much more to lose by not going. You and your family will be in my thoughts. Best wishes!
Thank you Erin, I’m glad to hear it.
I thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. So glad that you have a positive attitude and have plans to move forward with grace. All the best to you!
Thanks Karman.
I am sending my thoughts and prayers your way. You’re going to kick cancer’s A@@!! And we’re with you 100%
I’m definitely looking forward to kicking some cancer butt! Thanks Michelle.
Wish you all the best, sure you will beat this.
Thanks Thomas.
Try to stay positive. My prayers are with you. GOD speed!
I’ll definitely try. I’m sure it will get rough once treatments start, but the prize at the end will be well worth it.
Oh man, HANG IN THERE AND BEST OF LUCK AND HEALTH! Hopefully you can downshift a bit, relax, and reduce stress.
I have faith in you!
Sam
Thanks for the encouragement Sam. Perhaps the silver lining to this whole experience will put a new sense of priority on downshifting lots of unnecessary distractions in life and focusing on what’s truly important.
Thank you so much for posting this–I’m sure it was not an easy thing to write. I’m very much pulling for you and best wishes for a speedy and complete recovery.
Thanks Eric. It was a bit tough to write, but it also felt necessary. Life is definitely going to change in one shape or form.
I love your outlook on this “bump” in your road. You’ve got your eyes on the prize and you won’t let anything stop you!
Thanks Emily. I’m finding objectifying this whole thing to be something completely defeat-able to be very helpful.
Wow….sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I am happy to read about your outlook however. This would be an easy excuse to stop living life and striving for all of the things that you’ve worked for and are working towards. I truly believe our attitudes have more power over our lives than we imagine and I think that by approaching things with a positive attitude, we can overcome things that are difficult.
Keep pushing forward and striving to be your best everyday. There will most certainly be more bumps in the road, but always remember of all the great things you have in life.
Thanks Don and I couldn’t agree more. For a short time while I was digesting the news I was mad and felt cheated that everything I’ve worked so hard for could be compromised so quickly. But then I realized – not everything I’ve worked for is necessarily all about me. It’s also about my wife, my kids, and the kind of legacy I want to leave behind. That put things back into perspective and really helped to shape this “I must still overcome and win” brave-face I’m trying to put on. Plus, like you said, simply leading with a positive attitude and believing everything is going to come through will have more power and effect than anything else I can at this point.
Thank you so much for opening up and sharing something so personal and difficult with us. You are right that things often don’t go the way we expected, but that doesn’t mean we should feel defeated. We must push on through and do whatever it takes to get through each day.
Your story and spirit are inspirational for a lot of us who have loved ones with cancer or our own ailments. I’m glad your employers are being supportive through this. Best of luck with your treatments and recovery!! Enjoy the time with your family, rest and destress, and keep fighting! -Sydney
Thanks Sydney. I do feel very, very fortunate that both myself and my wife’s employers have been work have each been very supportive with us on this situation. Though the conditions will be less than desirable, I’ll take the time for what its worth during treatments to slow down and really just try to focus on the small, meaningful things I have to appreciate.
It saddens me, MMD. I will pray for your health. Be positive! 🙁 May God give you determination and strength.
Thanks for the prays Jayson. I really do appreciate it. I’ll take anything I can at this point!
Oh man, I don’t even know what to say. Sorry to hear about the diagnosis. I hope everything goes well for you and yours. At least you’re not letting it get you down!
Best wishes,
ARB
Just trying to stay brave even though I know the treatments won’t be fun. But I know its a necessary evil if I’m going to overcome this. Thanks for the wishes.
MMD as a fairly new subscribing reader, all I can say is I know you will beat this. Let me say also that I am very glad to see you writing again. Your positive outlook and convictions are inspiring for many others.
Continued Strength,
JlF
Thanks JIF and welcome to the site!
Sorry to hear but you have to remain positive with life.Thanks for opening up and sharing this story.
Thanks Amos.
You’ve got this.
Cancer runs deep in my family and by watching my Grandma battle cancer and win multiple times I truly believe that the attitude you keep is more important than anything else. And you are a fighter!
I’ve been praying for you and your family since I saw this last week. Stay strong and keep pushing forward you will beat this!
I really appreciate it Alexa and will try to keep the attitude upbeat. My eyes are the prize – beating this thing and being clear 6 months from now.
Mate that’s huge – please let me know if I can do anything to help, and if you feel comfortable, please let me know how everything develops.
Ironically I just went to the doctor about 2 hours ago to have a lump in my neck checked… I got the all clear, but still – strange timing considering yours was the first site I decided to visit on my lunch break.
Thanks for the offer Glen. And I’m glad to hear you went to the doctor to get a similar thing checked out and it was okay. After this experience I’ll never question questioning going to the doctor for any sort of symptom, no matter how small, again!
I’m sorry to hear about your diagnosis. But I applaud you in your positivity. I really do think that the way you think about it can either make or break you. Prayers absolutely work too! I also think it’s great that you have an awesome support system in your family and friends, that is important. That being said, I know you’ll pull through this. Stay strong!
Thanks Joseph. I couldn’t agree with you more that this is going to be mind over matter.